Category Archives: mtv

Taylor Swift Doesn’t Know What She’s Talking About

That's not your kid. The jig is up.

OK.  Before you Taylor Lovers (Swiffers?  Tay-zers?  I’m spitballin’ here) light your torches, let me start by saying that I like Taylor Swift.  I think she’s adorable, and I want one of her bedazzled guitars for my own.

I also, like everyone else in America, felt really bad for her last year after Kanye went all vigilante on her VMA win.  While I really could have given two craps about her music, I suddenly became hyper-aware of her, and bobbed my head when her songs came on the radio.

But while I was bobbing, something just wasn’t . . . right.  Her songs made me feel kinda funny, and I couldn’t figure out why.  Then, I was watching “The Sing Off” last year and I saw this video:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

That’s “Maxx Factor,” a barbershop quartet of soccer moms or something.  It’s not the best thing I’ve ever heard, but it is really sweet.  And it makes sense, because the song sounds like it’s something they could have actually lived.  Admit it, the line, “We were both young when I first saw you/ I close my eyes and the flashback starts” sounds a lot truer coming from a couple middle-aged broads than a 19-year old waif.

I love that Swift writes her own hits.  I love that she tells big stories in a 4-minute song.  I just don’t love it when she puts out a single that is too big for its britches (I’m bringing that phrase back, y’all.  My granny would be proud).  Part of enjoying an artist’s music is that you feel like you get a peek into his or her story.  In the case of “Love Story,”  I just feel like she wanted to sing about “Romeo and Juliet” but her manager was like, “Girl, that’s mad depressing.  Change the ending and throw in some stuff about flashbacks. Do you have a banjo?  Throw that up in there, too!”  (I don’t know why her manager talks like Diddy. . . just go with it)

She’s only 20.  Why does she have to be in such a rush to sing about stuff she couldn’t possibly have lived yet?  Like the video for “Mine.”  She’s got kids and shiz.  I’m sure her dad was  like, “WTF, Tay?  Kids?  You trying to give he a heart attack?!”

Can’t you just picture this video starring Martina McBride or somebody?  I dunno. Who’s hot in Country these days that’s not still a fetus?  Maybe I’m over thinking it.  I get that she wants to tell romantic love stories, I just like her better when she’s singing about short shorts and sneakers, or whatever.

So am I crazy?  Is Taylor a little girl playing lyrical Dress Up?  Or are these the best songs of all time?  ALL TIME!  (See what I did there?!)


Music Monday: VMAs Edition!

Last night was the MTV VMAs!  I mostly watched to see if there would be any major dramaticals a la Kanyegate 2009, but I was hoping for some inventive performances, too.  For today’s Music Monday post, I’m gonna run down some of my favorite moments!

1.  DJ Mickey Head (DJ DeadMau5)

"When you wish upon an LED. . ."

Why does he exist? Is it a commentary on how corporate greed is killing the music industry?  How can he spin with that thing on?  No matter, he kept me grooving before commercial breaks, and he offered my friends and I hours (and status update loads worth) of intrigue.

2.  That Stage

It totally amped up Usher’s performance with lasers and light.  It turned ethereal white for Florence + The Machine’s amazing spectacle.  And it provided Kanye a perfect entrance moment for his closing number.  I’m gonna need MTV to incorporate this bad boy for everything from now on.

3.  Fierce Femmes

Speaking of Flo + M, how badass was she?  I loved everything about her performance of “Dog Days Are Over.”  Everything was pitch-perfect; from the crazy dancing to the drums and lights.  I hope she actually gets played on MTV after this.

It was also great to see Robyn out there for a hot second.  This Swedish stunner has come a long way from her old teen pop days in the 90s.  She’s put out some fantastic dance music, including “Dancing On My Own,” which she performed last night.

I also loved Lady Gaga’s outfits and awards speeches.  She was pure entertainment.  Chelsea Handler was pretty funny as the host.  I’m not sure her brand of humor was always a good match for the crowd, but her video short with Jason Derulo was really cute.  All in all, I think the ladies totally brought it last night.

That being said. . .

Stuff That Was Wack

Taylor Swift

When it comes to Taylor, Kathy knows best

I want to be on her side, but that much-hyped performance was LAME.  I mean, it’s been a year TayTay- get over it.  She acted like it was this horrible thing that she’s still rebounding from, and not the major career boost that it was.  And, like, I couldn’t be moved by the song anyway ’cause she was so off pitch.

Cheers to another VMAs.  It’s probably one of the two times that I watch MTV all year.  Well, for more than 10 minutes while I get dressed in the morning.  So, did you watch the VMAs this year?  Do you have a new appreciation for lasers after Usher’s performance? What was your favorite part of the show?  Tell me in the comments!

Music With a Message: Eminem feat. Rihanna

Happy Monday, friends!

Sunday morning I was watching the news and there was a report about Eminem’s new video for “Love the Way You Lie,” his duet with Rihanna.  It was basically saying that “some people” are not fans of the vid because of all the violence.  And that is terrible, but it got me thinking:

Does anyone still watch music videos?

I mean, MTV never shows them anymore.  I don’t know a lot of other channels that show them.  Maybe CMT?  I don’t know.  I don’t watch it.  Anyway, just for your reference, here’s the video in question:

What do you think?  Is it too violent for TV?  Is Rihanna singing to Chris Brown? Is there any way Dominic Monaghan could get with Megan Fox in real life? Why don’t I look like Rihanna in hotpants?  I have serious questions, people!

Note:  Obviously, all jokes aside, I don’t condone domestic violence.  If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, please call the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

An Awkward Situation

Found this at Awkward Family Photos.  Couldn’t those boys find any turtlenecks in their size?  Amazing.

That little sister needs a pouf. STAT!

Boo Hoo.

The Kanye West/ Lady Gaga “Fame Kills” tour has been canceled.   According to Rolling Stone, the tour may have been axed due to poor ticket sales.  Still others say that, following his erratic behavior at this year’s VMAs, West might be entering rehab.
Whatever the reason for the cancellation, I’m sure there won’t be too many broken hearts.  Those tickets were running 150 bucks a pop, and we’re totes in a recession!

His Jay-Z Is Scary

Check out this spoof by Affion Crockett, one of the stars of MTV’s “Wild ‘N Out.” He has Jay, Kanye, and Chris Brown down, I think!

BTW: It’s probably NSFW ’cause of all the swears

I’m Sorry, So Sorry. . .

So, we all know about Kanyegate- and the subsequent apologies he issued on his blog and on Twitter. But, according to Taylor Swift, he has yet to talk to her directly. Watch her on “The View,” below.

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